Random Rambles: Migraines, Failures, Gemstones, and Productivity

I guess in a way this is a writing-related post, but I'm delving into this with a migraine. If you've never had a migraine, don't wish for one. Just don't. Save yourself. Today's is a mild one. I took medicine, which is settling the actual pain in my skull to a warning twinge, a constant reminder of the doom that awaits me when the medication wears off.

I finished the outline notes for Blood Diamond, book three of the Witch & Wolf series. That's right. I have the completed outline notes for book three.

I'm looking at a first quarter release for the third book. I'm excited! Winter Wolf will be drafted starting tomorrow. I haven't decided what my goal is, but I may settle for ‘one scene per work day' while I address other important things, like client editorial.

Here's where the failure part comes in. I need to do client editorial work today, but with this twingy, evil, energy-sucking migraine, it isn't happening. I feel terrible. Both physically and ethically. I'm going to get at least one chapter done for someone tonight, even if I have to trudge through hell and high water to do so.

The weather isn't helping, I'll just say that much.

If I were super ethics girl, I would be fighting through the pain and finishing all of the editorial work. However, because I have ethics, I won't. I can't do my clients justice. The one project I will work on because his edits are easy. We've been working together for multiple novels, and he is totally used to the days where I'm on pain medication and working. I can make funny comments, and he won't be offended. I can't do this with new clients. He's used to me, my sense of humor, and knows when to ask me what I really meant if I send a note that makes sense only to me.

(By the way, these are among the absolute best business relationships out there. If you ever get an editor or a client you have that rapport with, try not to let them go. They're true gems of priceless value.)

Speaking of gems, I love gemstones. I really love them. Here is a picture of one of my gemstones.

gemstones 001

This is a citrine, an orange quartz-type gemstone. I bought it on ebay, because I loved its shade of orange. It's considered a ‘junk' gemstone. Not at all precious, like a diamond or a ruby.

But I love citrines.

gemstones 007

This is an absolutely terrible photograph, but here is a large chunk of my small stones collection.

I am making a vow to myself to add one new stone to my collection every $500 I make in royalties. (One stone costs anywhere between 5-20 bucks.)

Accepting donations to my dragon hoard. Teeheheheee. For the curious, the bottom row features many citrines. The blue stone is a topaz, as are the three stones next to it. The red stone is a blood-red garnet. The bright blues are turquoise.

In the next row, I can't remember, I can't remember, my tanzanites (those are the purple stones next to the moon stones on the right hand side), then there are a bunch of moonstones my mother gave me. Then I start forgetting what everything is. I have the names of most of them written on the bottom of the containers.

Yes, the big cluster of tiny white stones on the right side, middle row are diamonds.

There are two really interesting batches of stones in this box. In the top row, you can see one little white, round stone. That is a clam pearl. Clam pearls are rare. Oysters are your pretty pearl producers. Clam pearls are unwanted, they do not have luster like oyster pearls do.

I found this one in my dinner one day. Bit on it, just about gagged, and fished it out of my clam chowder. Had to look it up online because, you know, random hard, white, and round thing in my clam chowder. My homemade clam chowder.

Clam pearl. It's a rare find. Glad I didn't break my teeth.

Second rare set of stones in that box is a matched set of alexandrites. For their size, not cheap. When you put them in different types of light, they change colors. It's really cool. I like them a lot. They are the ‘bleh' colored stones on the left side above the four turquoise.

Okay, enough about one of my obsessions. Onto the productivity and failure part of this rambles. We'll ignore the fact I talked about failure once already, okay? That's the migraine. I forget things when my head hurts, even though it's something I wrote about five hundred words ago. This is why I try not to edit while migraining. Migraining is now a verb.

Failure builds character, or some crap like that. Frankly, failures suck. What does failure do? You know, beyond make you think you're completely worthless and should be run over by a transport?

It can, if you choose, provide motivation. I hate failing. I hate being a failure. When I fail, it's like someone lights a candle under my ass and holds my favorite treats out of reach. I can't jump to get my treats or my ass'll catch on fire. So no treat, and a hot butt.

Not cool. Nope, nope, nope. It's the emotional equivalent of the nopefish. If you haven't seen the nopefish… just don't. Nope, nope, nope.

To be fair, I worked from 9 AM to 5 PM with very few stops. I reached a very important goal. I was productive today. I just wasn't as productive as I wanted to be.

And tomorrow, I'll do better. Or I'm going to start beating my head into a wall. Because I do not like failure.

If I could give anyone a single piece of advice today, it would be this: Make failure your arch nemesis. Tactical nuke its ass. And when you do fail… don't get mad. Get event.

Every productive day is a victory you can embrace, claim, and enjoy.

The failures? The fuel for your fire. It won't take away the pain of defeat, but it makes the next victory all the much sweeter.

People say I'm a writing machine. If I were a machine, I wouldn't have emotions, and I wouldn't try to do better.

I try to live doing better each day… and I fail often.

I just stand back up.

You can too.

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